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extraordinary breastfeeding

topic posted Wed, April 4, 2007 - 9:01 AM by  Unsubscribed
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i wanted to open up discussion based on this video youtube.com/watch please watch. i will give my thoughts on it after a few others, so that i won't risk biasing the thread.
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  • Re: extraordinary breastfeeding

    Wed, April 4, 2007 - 9:35 AM
    i wept.

    it was so beautiful and lovely and inspiring.

    (i'd rather not get specific until more mommas see it)
    • Re: extraordinary breastfeeding

      Thu, April 5, 2007 - 12:50 PM
      i think i overlooked any surprise i may have had seeing a seven year-old breastfeed because i could sense such an incredible bond between mother & daughters right from the start ... veronika's extra ordinary instincts were evident to me immediately. with abby sitting on my lap, i got weepy thinking about our bond .. how it's evolved these past seven and a half months and how it will continue to evolve and deepen over the years, whether she continues to long-term breastfeed or not.

      the most moving aspect of their story for me was the girls' sweet & sensitive articulation of their love for their mommy's breast milk and breasts ... not to mention daddy's positive & loving perspective. a rare public glimpse into the life of well-adjusted family ... i feel blessed to have witnessed their devotion. i only hope as a family we are able to achieve such a level of understanding & commitment to one another (i believe we're on our way!)
  • Re: extraordinary breastfeeding

    Wed, April 4, 2007 - 11:43 AM
    WOW! They seem like a happy well- off family, it's beautiful that they get so much joy out of it. Mama's strong, there's noway I could do it I have 2yr old twins and it's overwhelming for me at times.
    • Re: extraordinary breastfeeding

      Wed, April 4, 2007 - 1:51 PM
      Here's an article written by the mom in the video:

      shazzie.com/raw/articles...feeding.shtml

      Right now there are a lot of very positive comments on YouTube!
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        Re: extraordinary breastfeeding

        Wed, April 4, 2007 - 5:44 PM
        well, i will bare myself here & admit that when i first saw the girl stick her head under her mother's shirt & lay down beside her, i was shocked. she looked so big & not like a baby. if they were american, they would have cps busting their door down, accusing her of molesting her kids (not an exagerration, it has happened). but if everyone in the family is happy with it, then i need to keep an open mind about it. i often wish i could remember being breastfed, but alas, i cannot. my cousin was breastfed until she was 5 & she is actually a genius, no kidding.

        i take my own inspiration from primitive woman, tribal woman. i think to myself "what would primitive woman do?" (WWPWD?) would an african tribeswoman continue nursing her grown daughter? probably not. daughter probably has work to do & mom is also busy taking care of the household. would a tibetan mother do this? again, probably not. i think we, in the western culture, have the luxury of time to spend on our kids. i wonder what a native, primitive tribeswoman would say if she saw this.
        • Re: extraordinary breastfeeding

          Wed, April 4, 2007 - 7:15 PM
          It was interesting to see and I liked reading the article as well. I agree with you on the concept of following what primitive or tribal woman would do. I often find myself consulting those roots when thinking on a child issue. I don't always follow because I have to do what fits well in our lives but I do find keeping that in mind is helpful. I also agree that most primitive women wouldn't breastfeed for quite as long as that woman Veronika chose to.
          I wasn't shocked or surprised at that woman breastfeeding an older child though I will admit that I just don't see me doing it. Still that family seemed healthy and happy and they found something that works for them. It was interesting hearing what the girls had to say about breast milk and breastfeeding. I will also admit I have been around some families with older kids who breastfed and I was disturbed but then I have been around others with older kids and I wasn't. Thinking about the one that did disturb me it really had nothing to do with the breastfeeding so much as the constant struggle that the Mother and child engaged in over the breast. The mother didn't want to breastfeed anymore and was vocal about it but then would bribe her child with breastfeeding to get him to behave in certain ways. The flip side of that is in High School one of my best friends had a little sister who was still breastfeeding at 5 and now she is a super cool young woman and very well adjusted and smart. I think it all depends on what works for the family and whether they approach it in a healthy way.
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        Re: extraordinary breastfeeding

        Wed, April 4, 2007 - 5:53 PM
        thnk you for posting that article, fixit! i was comforted to read that she had the same reaction i had the first time she saw an older child bfing. alot of great info included. how did you find it?
        • Re: extraordinary breastfeeding

          Thu, April 5, 2007 - 1:07 PM
          I-dra,
          I went to Mothering.com to see if anyone had posted about the video in their Nursing Beyond Infancy forum, and someone already had- and someone else had info on the article. It is cool to see more about the family, in the mom's own words.

          As for traditional societies, everything I've read says that moms do indeed nurse their kids much longer than those in industrialized countries.
          Just as the mom says, how could we have a worldwide average weaning age of four and a half if lots of moms didn't nurse as long as she has?

          It seems that Western societies have far more sexual taboos about nursing/breasts than the rest of the world.
          Consider the man who walks unannounced into a room full of Muslim women nursing their babies. They hurry to cover their faces, but do not alter their exposure for nursing. (I wish I could remember where I heard this anecdote- I think it was NPR, long ago)

          Personally, I wouldn't want to nurse a seven year old.
          *But to each her own- and I'll support her choices! *
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    Re: extraordinary breastfeeding

    Wed, April 4, 2007 - 7:03 PM
    wow that was so well done. I wonder if Irie will breastfeed that long
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      Re: extraordinary breastfeeding

      Thu, April 5, 2007 - 9:37 AM
      one hand = short post

      also disturbed, yet they seem healthy and well. I think its only possible because they homeschool. other kids would get teased into stopping I think, for better or worse.

      reminds me of the show little britain. anyone seen it?
  • Re: extraordinary breastfeeding

    Thu, April 12, 2007 - 12:12 PM
    I find this very interesting. No judgements either way, really. Just interesting to ponder. I'm not sure how long I will breast feed, probably as long as it's mutually wanted. I DO however personally remember breastfeeding and how wonderful it was. Even more clearly I remember when I was denied the boob! Man, that was a shocker! I waddled up my momma who was sitting down and signed I wanted to be held, she picked me up and I asked/signed for the boob and when she said no....man, o, man... that was a weird moment. I was too young to express myself but i totally remember feeling really ashamed for wanting it... like it was bad or a sexual thing, in retrospect I know it was completely innocent. But my first memory of shame, for sure! I also feel that I've always had the urge/need to be nutured and held like that because it was taken away too soon. I guess I'm glad that those two kids got to choose when to end it, even though I doubt I'll breast feed to age 7. probably would have helped me out emotionally to decide for myself or at least to have one last session on the breast and better communication around weening.
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    Re: extraordinary breastfeeding

    Tue, May 1, 2007 - 4:28 PM
    totally cool.

    the last time i breastfed my son, he was 6 years old (stopped breastfeeding regularly at age 4 but still shared an occasional nursing moment with his little sister, just as she does now with the littlest one). i agree with this mom, the main difference is only that they take up more space! it turns out my two older children have depressed immune systems from toxic mold exposure. i can only guess at the benefits extended nursing has given them.
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    Re: extraordinary breastfeeding

    Tue, May 1, 2007 - 11:14 PM
    I also cringed a bit when her daughter lay on her lap, but once she was latched on, I felt fine, even a little jealous.

    It was me that weaned my younger son at 3 and a half. An odd switch flipped in my head and I stopped offering to nurse him. The La Leche League calls that the "Don't Offer Don't Refuse" weaning method. Less demand and my supply dwindled until he lost interest as well.

    If that switch hadn't flipped he could still be nursing today at almost 7, and I would be totally fine with it.
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      Re: extraordinary breastfeeding

      Tue, May 1, 2007 - 11:25 PM
      I've been reading a bit more of Kate Wood's article. Her milk supply IS extraordinary. I'm not quite sure why my milk dried up at 7 months pregnant, but I have heard of that happening to other mothers. Probably the stress of life when my body needed to grow a baby. Could also have been because I couldn't fit my belly and my toddler in bed with me at night. My cheap husband wouldn't buy a king size bed. "You would only need it for a couple more months". dickweed.

      Sorry about that last bit. He's out of town. I think I'm a bit depressed.
      • Re: extraordinary breastfeeding

        Wed, May 2, 2007 - 3:42 PM
        Wow, fascinating.
        It was definitely odd to see the 7 year old lie down at the boob
        but on the whole I got a really warm feeling from the clip and the family.
        It just didn't feel weird in the context of their family for some reason.

        I don't imagine I would feed my daughter to age 7 (and could get in trouble here in the US if I did)
        but I think this helps me open my mind to knowing I could do it longer (than say a year)

        It also does strike me how afraid our culture is of the body.

        Thank you for posting this!
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          Re: extraordinary breastfeeding

          Wed, May 2, 2007 - 6:43 PM
          yes it is amusing how scared we are of nursing. I was nursing my son in the ergo and talking to this young girl about registering to vote and she just stopped and said " it is so cool that you are just nursing right now and chatting with me, people are so afraid of breasts when they are being used for what they are supposed to" she is right on.

          I think that her milk probably did dry up when she was pregnant, I know many women who still nurse through pregnancy and usually the child will just stop until the milk comes back.
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            Re: extraordinary breastfeeding

            Thu, May 3, 2007 - 3:27 PM
            my children kept nursing through pregnancy even though there was little to no milk in the last months.
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              Proudly breastfeeding

              Fri, May 18, 2007 - 5:46 AM
              I know I'm a little late to post but I was touched by this woman and her family. It was so tender and nurturing. "Better than a hundred melons," the little girl said.
              I watched this while breastfeeding my son and he layed his head on my breast and took his tiny hands and stroked them. It was very sweet. I thought, 'I'll breastfeed you as long as you like.' and then I told him that very thing. I think he understood on some level what I was saying because he smiled.
              Thank you for making my day!
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                Re: Proudly breastfeeding

                Tue, May 22, 2007 - 6:19 PM
                But, I meant to add, not until eight. Age 4 is my limit. i am open minded though and to each their own but I feel age 8 is too long. It's really sweet though, the family's bond.
  • Re: extraordinary breastfeeding

    Tue, May 22, 2007 - 7:57 PM
    I have to say (and please just take it as my opinion) that I'm not a fan of children breastfeeding for that long. Children who rely on their parents for that kind of comfort become very dependent upon their mother. As a result, they don't develop the same kind of independence as other children at as young of an age. Then again, I was always a very independent child and so was my husband.

    That being said, the only reason I weaned my daughter at seven months is because I had to. I really had no choice. At 5'6" I was down to 102lbs (I should have been about 125) and Corde had dropped to the 10th percentile in weight and the 15th in height. She was pretty big before that. She dropped from the high end to the low end in less than a month. If it weren't for that, I would have kept nursing her until she was ready to quit. While I may feel that children who wean earlier become more independent, and that's a good thing in my book, I'm not at all for forcing a child to wean because of my beliefs. I'm also not for telling a child that they need to wean because they're too grown up. Forcing a child to wean before they're ready doesn't foster independence. It doesn't make the child feel any more grown up. It just makes them feel guilty for wanting it, and think of the complexes that causes!

    Now that I have another baby, I doubt that I'll be nursing him until he's four or five, but I'll let him decide when that time is. Unfortunately, in this country, I may get hell for nursing my boy too long. It's that whole sexual thing. Even so, it's up to him, not me. Whatever he needs. My husband and I may have our opinions, but my child's needs come before any opinion of mine. He's too important for me to force him into something like that. If he needs that connection, he'll get it.
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      Re: extraordinary breastfeeding

      Tue, May 22, 2007 - 8:02 PM
      You're the second story I've heard of dramatic weight loss while nursing. What's the secret? I never lost that much and I'm a bit jealous. I was always so hungry when nursing!
      • Re: extraordinary breastfeeding

        Tue, May 22, 2007 - 8:15 PM
        I wish I knew what the secret was to prevent it from happening this time. Then again, I almost wish I did know. I've only lost ten pounds from my heaviest during the pregnancy. I actually gained weight in the week after he was born! He's seven weeks old! You'd think I would have lost something by now!
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          Re: extraordinary breastfeeding

          Wed, May 23, 2007 - 4:30 AM
          I am 5'3 and weigh 109. I weighed 125 pre-pregnancy. Should I be worried? I feel healthy. How did you know that this was a serious issue? Were you having health problems? If you don't mind me asking I am just curious.
          • Re: extraordinary breastfeeding

            Wed, May 23, 2007 - 5:28 PM
            From what I understand, for 5'3", 109 isn't bad. I should have been between 125-135, so I was really low. I looked anorexic, which was one of the clues. I was incredibly tired and had no energy to do anything. My doctor was concerned.

            Honestly, if your baby is maintaining a healthy weight, then I wouldn't worry too much. I wasn't really having much in the way of health problems aside from that. If you feel healthy, that's a huge sign. I really didn't. I didn't feel sick, but I didn't feel like I was healthy either. I just did a search for the average weight for your height and it looks like you're in a good range for your height. That being said, I wouldn't worry about it much. If you do really feel it could be a problem, call your doctor because they can best advise you. Sometimes all you need to do is change your diet. Unfortunately, that didn't work for me.
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      Re: extraordinary breastfeeding

      Thu, May 24, 2007 - 11:53 PM
      just wanna say: my children are extremely independent and have been from very early on. you should see my 1 year old! all nursed as long as they want. the primary comment i hear about my children is that they are remarkably independent and comfortable with themselves.
  • Re: extraordinary breastfeeding

    Thu, May 24, 2007 - 8:50 AM
    I loved it...Well done, and I also felt a very special bond between mother and child, not anything weird or odd. I BF all 7 of my children, some longer than others, but not sure how I would do with a 7 yr old...my son now almost 4 still had an amazing facination with my breasts, and likes to fall asleep with his hands in my armpits, cause thats what he used to do while nursing...it is comforting to both of us...I know that I will not have anymore children, but am expecting my second grandchild(girl, already have a 4 yr old grandson, who nursed till 3) and I am helping my daughter get ready for her new job as mum...she was not sure about nursing, due to flack from young girlfriends who do not have children yet, about saggy boob, and all the other things that young, uneducated girls may fear...we have explored all the options, and she is ready to give it a try...We have talked a lot about it and she sees the benefits, and I am so grateful, but I think this video might frighten her, since she is still a little nervous...Thanks you so much for posting this beautiful video...Hugs to all, Gigi
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      Re: extraordinary breastfeeding

      Thu, May 24, 2007 - 7:08 PM
      Solomon is almost 6 months and 17.5 lbs. He's had bananas 2 times now. He's extrememly healthy. I know nursing sure takes the weight off some women but you know, I eat really healthy and not too much and I am still heavier than I was pre-pregnancy by 20 lbs.
      Two of my women friends said they lost weight when they stopped nursing so maybe it depends on the woman.
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        Re: extraordinary breastfeeding

        Thu, May 24, 2007 - 8:08 PM
        a friend told me to expect to keep a little extra on you as long as you're nursing. it has something to do with all the extra hormones.

        i ate a lot while pregnant & gained 55 pounds! but 7 months after giving birth, i have lost 45 pounds! my little guy just keeps me so active! i hope he wants to nurse at least 2 years, but one can never tell...

        also, i-dra thanks for sharing the story & video of this amazing family.
  • Re: extraordinary breastfeeding

    Thu, February 21, 2008 - 11:33 AM
    holy beans...or mangos...that was something.
    as i sit here with a 23+ inch person attached to my breast, i cannot imagine her filling up the rest of this couch parked at my boob.

    that was a trip.

    better than a million melons.....
  • Re: extraordinary breastfeeding

    Sat, May 31, 2008 - 7:03 AM
    I've been reading responses to this documentary on several web pages. What amazes me is how strongly people react - whether positive or negative. I'm in the middle. I believe in child-led weaning, and my kids (age 12 & 15 now) both weaned at 2.5. But the school of thought I was taught in La Leche League was that allowing toddlers to wean themselves was a way of giving them a sense of security as they venture away from mother and take steps towards the independence of childhood. Toddlerhood is an important transition period, and if handled properly (i.e. gentle encouragement towards independence without pushing) they should emerge from it no longer needing the comfort of the bottle, pacifier, or breast (let alone a security blanket or thumb-sucking). They usually potty-train around the same time. Normally, they are quite proud at this point to be a "big girl/boy".
    What disturbed me was that the 8-year-old had not successfully left this "baby" behavior behind yet. Then, when her mother's milk started drying up, she smacked her mother's breast and pouted like a 2-year-old. Watching the video, I saw footage of this girl nursing an an infant, with her older sister on the other breast at the exact same time. Nothing wrong with that, but nursing is a bonding time for mother an infant. Perhaps the older sister consistently interfered with her nursing time out of jealously? When I first brought my son home from the hospital, my daughter was glued beside me every time I nursed him, feeling possesive because she saw BF as something only she shared with me. She adjusted, it was just a shock to her at first (she said "He likes milkies, too?" LOL). I wonder if this girl is keeping a death-grip on breastfeeding because she finally has mom to herself, now that the older sister has weaned. I just think something went wrong somewhere along the line, for her not to have made a complete transition to childhood yet, IMHO.

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